The Mighty are running monthly self-confidence challenges all year. I religiously did the daily writing in January. Was too exhausted to do whatever the February challenge was! But I’m going to drop in late and start the March Challenge. The week three task is:

Continue to focus on accomplishing the task list you made during week two. Your list should include easy-to-accomplish items that show a mastery of your skills. When you cross an item off your list, take a selfie or a photo of your accomplishment, and post it somewhere (it could be social media or on a wall in your house) to remind yourself of your accomplishments.

So yesterday (day before?!) I said I’d take photos to represent my five strengths. Here’s a rough, vague, kinda sorta representation of what are (apparently) my five strengths.
1. Kindness and generosity: I need to send a little my own way….

I bought myself a new dress and cardigan. It had an extra 20% off the reduced price so really I could say I’ve saved money 😀
2. Honesty, authenticity, and genuineness: I can’t acknowledge my feelings. I try – but I don’t feel them. I can’t identify them.

So when making a cup of tea this afternoon, instead of playing on my phone while waiting for the kettle to boil, I just stood there. Doing nothing. Thinking. Something I normally avoid like the plague. I noticed how incredibly fast my heart was pounding (105bpm – about twice my normal resting heart rate). I was anxious. No idea why. But I felt this was a good genuine moment for me. I tried anyway!
3. Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness: The things I am most resistant to, are no doubt the things I really need to embrace.

It may seem a very small thing… But I was incredibly resistant to taking multivitamins. My nutrition intake is poor, but I felt I should be able to recover first. As it turns out, my eating disorder is struggling, so I’ve succumbed and started taking them. I  just realised the past three days are the first time in well over a year  I haven’t experienced overwhelming fatigue.
4. Leadership:  I need to accept the leadership of those who understand this disease and recovery process so much better than me.

I have joined this facebook group and found hope and community and someone who has recovered and is so inspirational. I am seriously considering doing her next private group course. It’s a lot of money – but my health is an investment. I just have to be sure I’m ready to do what needs to be done before I invest.
5. Modesty and humility: Quit whinging. Quit looking at why and how. Follow the lead of those who know.

I haven’t done this yet. But much like number four, I accept I need to start doing what the support people around me keep telling me to do. Trust. And let them lead the way.